Technology In the Home: 3 Cs for Kids

“Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

– Romans 12:2

Introduction

The technology of the past twenty years has transformed the way that children learn, communicate, and are entertained. No other generation in world history has been raised this way, and there are some real blessings that our kids get to experience because of this. But like all blessings, we can steward them well or badly. 

Stewarding the gift of technology is not going to happen by chance for most families. It is way too easy to give into the ease that a screen offers, and this can have extremely negative consequences. This is why it is vital to have a strategy for intentional technology use. In our home, we use the Three Cs of Culture, Communication, and Contracts to help manage technology. 

Culture

It’s important to know what you want the culture of technology to look like in your home, and that you are using words, actions, rewards, and consequences to support that culture. 

How do you speak about technology? Do you talk about positive ways that God uses technology and how we can use it to give Him glory? Are you actively training your kids to understand the challenges and more concerning aspects of using it? Note: Axis.org is a great Christian resource that equips parents to have effective conversations about technology with their children!

How is the use of technology rewarded or discouraged in your home? Is it used for educational and/or spiritual purposes (homework, devotional videos, etc.), or is it primarily used as a time filler, resulting in wasted time or even perusing inappropriate sites? Are there consequences for poor choices and rewards for responsible ones?

How do you as parents use technology? If you’re on your phones at dinnertime, or when your kids are trying to talk to you, realize that your children will naturally model your behavior. Conversely, if you are using screens purposefully and with intention, they will see a wise example and be more likely to emulate it.

Communication

It’s important to have open and constant communication about the use of technology in your home. This way, kids know that you will always be aware of what they are doing when they’re using screens. It’s also vital that you talk with your children about the inappropriate things they may encounter online, and have a strategy to implement for when this happens. We don’t want our kids to be embarrassed or scared if they see something they shouldn’t; rather, we want them to know that Dad and Mom are the safe place to turn to when this happens. 

If you’re introducing a new kind of technology into your home, make sure your kids understand the expectations and boundaries associated with it. Encourage your children to be confident when they learn something new on their devices; this will encourage them to see technology as a positive thing in their lives and know that their parents want them to succeed. Last, role-play with them about peer pressure situations so they are ready to respond if their friends are using technology incorrectly.

Contracts

We recommend having a written agreement for technology use with each child. This little “contract” can include where the device can be used, where it will be stored, what it can be used for, how long it can be used each day, how it will be paid for, rewards for proper use, consequences for improper use or failure to follow the contract, approved apps, how often the parents will check the device, etc. At the end of the agreement should also be a statement reminding the child that technology is a gift from God to be used for His glory. The child should sign it, as should the parents. It’s also wise to review the contract periodically and update it, especially if kids have proven themselves responsible.

We acknowledge that this might sound strange to some people, but there are some serious benefits to doing this. Specifically, this ensures that everyone is on the same page and there is documented proof of the agreement in black and white. If Mom remembers some boundaries differently than the child, both parties can refer to the contract to solve the problem. This is a great way to prevent confusion and arguments!

Conclusion

Technology is a gift from God that can be used by your kids to His glory. However, this can really only happen if parents are actively teaching their families how to use it wisely. This takes hard work and a plan, which is why we wanted to share our Three Cs with you. We hope these suggestions inspire you to be more intentional with your kids as our world continues to advance in these incredible ways.

Key Points

• Carefully consider the kind of culture you want surrounding technology use in your home.
• Constant open communication is vital for the proper use of technology, acknowledging both the blessings and challenges.
• A written contract that has been tailor-made for your family will help ensure that everyone is on the same page.
• Technology is a blessing from God and can be used for His glory.